no peace of mind.

feel blue
will write random rubbish
i am selfish, i cant allow beloved one with any space for him, everything must belong to me
idea of him having fun somewhere else killing,
i am jealous, pathetically, what can be worse than womens jealousy? i dont know..
we had this accident, he went out for lunch with a girl telling me that it was a business meeting as he had no time during the day to figure,
first thing i got to know that he went not to canteen, but out in the city, second how much he suddenly knows about her, thirdly that he lied and just wanted to have lunch with her, at the same time being afraid about my possible reactions...
i hated him
i was killed
i was destroyed..
but apparently nothing had happened, and i was overreacting ..
nut i just need him, i tie him with every possible thing
i go to the gym with him , just to share his interests (to be completely honest here, i like it by now.., but thats another story)
i feel like Karenina, who tied Vronskogo with everything she could, and look how well it ended!)
i know that my way is the shortest way to loose him
on the other hand i dont really want to get married right now either..
he went to salsa alone tonight,, dont get me wrong, i have nearly nothing against, then for lord's sake tell me why it hurts so f..ing much
i am pathetic, cest sa.

@музыка: whats it all about Alfie

@настроение: blue.

@темы: Family life (zhizn semeynaya)

2009-05-21 в 00:36 

просто так сложно ведь Тебе - в чужой стране, ради него...
Потому и реагируешь очень сильно.


Дневник to-kate